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It came from The Gateway… What to watch this Halloween (Part 2)

So you made it through part one… let’s see how you fare in our sequel!

Welcome to The Gateway‘s version of a cable T.V. Halloween movie marathon. It’s more terrifying than SU Election voter turnout, more twisted than your calculus prof’s idea of a “simple concept,” and more inconsistently pleasing than your last drunken Dewey’s hookup. From the depths of Netflix, to the nostalgia of our childhoods, we bring you our picks for what to watch this Halloween season… part 2!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Show)

If you haven’t binge-watched Buffy in the last year, Halloween is the perfect time to get acquainted, or reacquainted, with the kick-ass crew of monster hunters who frequent Sunnydale High. From Buffy’s vamp-staking abilities, perfect 90s look, and fun friends to Angel and his amazing darkly lit jawline this show is gold. You can’t forget about Giles, Willow, Xander, the werewolf guy, Spike (the most sexually confusing character in history) or basically anything else that emerges from the Hellmouth. High school is fucking scary. – Sofia Osborne

The VVitch (2015)
Directed by Robert Eggers
Available on Netflix

This supernatural horror movie focuses on an exiled Quaker family in colonial America. During their exile, they settle near a witch coven. The film eerily follows the family as supernatural forces wreak havoc on them, culminating in an ending that is both head scratching and terrifying. It perfects the balance between long cut suspense and quick jump scares. Be assured that after this movie, you will spend the following nights with the lights on, and will never look at a petting zoo goat the same. – Nick Neitling

For more, listen to The Watch-men Podcast’s episode on The VVitch.

C U B E (1997)
Directed by Vincenzo Natali

For some reason, psychological horror is often left out of the discussion of Halloween horror in favour of movies with deranged, iconic psychopaths. If there are any psychopaths in Cube, they were normal people at the beginning of the movie. Cube is about a group of people locked in cube-shaped rooms, some of which try to kill them. The dialogue and acting are bad and one of the main reasons it’s still broadcast at all is because of Cancon, but the premise and what the director did with such little money are impressive. It’s not as terrifying as it was when you were channel-surfing in the 600s by the pay-per-view porn when you were 12 and stumbled across it, but it’s a Canadian gem. – Josh Greschner

Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! (TV show)

In the later weeks of October, there was nothing better than spending hours with your favourite mystery solving stoners during Teletoon’s Halloween cartoon marathon. You felt like one of the gang as you watched episode after episode of Fred, Daphne, Velma, Shaggy, and Scoob driving the Mystery Machine into an elaborate monster-based scheme, splitting up to find clues, setting a bombastic trap, and eventually unmasking a creepy dude named “old man something-or-other.” From the opening jingle, to the iconic gouls, ghosts, and creatures (The Creeper, Miner 49er, Tar Monster, and Jaguaro jump to mind), no other show will give the same nostalgic touch this Halloween. Dust off the VHS you taped over your parents wedding videos with, and prepare to say “jinkies!” as you join Mystery Inc.’s meddling kids once again for another timeless adventure. – Sam Podgurny

Black Sunday a.k.a The Mask of Satan (1960)
Directed by Mario Bava

You may have to do a little grave digging to turn up this 1960 gothic horror film. It’s in black and white and is way better than Vin Diesel’s The Last Witch Hunter. The visual effects in Black Sunday are almost 6 decades old but won’t disappoint an imaginative viewer today. The bubbling eyes of the dead witch in the tomb is still disturbing (to say the least) and raised the hairs on my arms. But there is a slow motion scene of a horse drawn carriage traveling through a forest that makes me think twice about going for a midnight stroll to wherever shadowy equines and 19th century transportation are still utilized. – Jonah Kondro

Rosemary’s Baby (1968)
Directed by Roman Polanski

In the final scene of Roman Polanski’s psychological horror film, Rosemary (Mia Farrow) learns that she gave birth to the son of Satan. At first horrified, Rosemary clutches to her baby blue nightgown while the roomful of Satanists yell “Hail, Satan!” and tell her not to fret; Minnie, Rosemary’s conniving neighbor and cult leader, says she should be “honored” to have born Satan’s child. If initially the audience’s allegiances lied squarely, and only, with Rosemary, then once she cradles her son the audience is left to fend for themselves. It was once Rosemary and audience vs. the Devil. Now we’re left to confront evil without a heroine by our sides. I can’t imagine anything scarier than this sort of loneliness. – Arden Burtnik

Heathers (1988)
Directed by Michael Lehmann

Heathers, although a black comedy, is the scariest movie ever made because it could never have been made today. The film stars Winona Ryder as Veronica, a recent member of the most popular clique in high school where all three girls are named “Heather.” Veronica becomes bored of the Heathers and begins dating J.D. (Christian Slater), and together they embark on a plot to kill the snobby cool kids. She writes in her diary, “my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count.” The film climaxes when J.D. attempts, but is thwarted by Veronica, to blow-up the school on prom night because, as he declares, “the extreme always seems to make an impression.” I can’t think of a single film from this decade — let alone last — that is so biting and unsentimental, yet refuses ironic detachment. Heathers, in a post-Columbine, post-whatever-next-mass-murder cultural landscape, is amoral and proud. I mourn that anything like it will never be made again. – Arden Burtnik

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992)
Directed by Francis Ford Coppola

The first vampire I encountered in my life was Count von Count on Sesame Street. I can’t remember what the second, third, or fourth vampire was (ironically), but eventually I was exposed to Bram Stoker’s Dracula in film form. Forget CGI effects, Team Edward, or that movie where Hugh Jackman was running around as Van Helsing, Bram’s Stoker’s Dracula does both the horror and vampire genre a lot of justice. If you don’t know who Francis Ford Coppola is, well, The Godfather trilogy is on his resume, and that should be enough to sit you down for a viewing of Dracula this October. If anything else, there are one ah ah ah, two ah ah ah, three ah ah ah, topless vampires in the movie. – Jonah Kondro

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